April 2, 2012
You have aspirations for success, yet you never seem to be earning what you think you should be earning. Financially, you are a little flimsy in saving, spending, and being generally savvy about financial matters.
A poll asked 20,000 people about the money habits they grew up with, and revealed that half of parents had never discussed finances with their children, and two-thirds had never revealed their income to them.
Another poll found that most people felt they were worth twice what they were paid, regardless of what they made. And making more at a future time still resulted in them thinking they were only halfway there.
Our money story is self-induced, and often run by a myriad of subconscious messages that reaffirm, usually set into place by our parents and early experiences.
The sad consequence is that when we don’t advocate for ourselves as higher value, whether that means asking for higher fees, negotiating a bigger salary, or simply selling ourselves as a good investment, we begin to be seen as not worthy of higher value. This can often come back around to reflecting on our self-worth, and reinforcing the message all over again.
See where this leads? A vicious cycle!
The path of least resistance is to Repeat and Rationalize. This is your habitual brain following neuronal paths that have been etched deeply. Messages like:
- When I am stressed, I need retail therapy.
- I can’t earn that amount. The market won’t allow it.
- I’ll never make as much as my parents.
- I can never save as much as I want, so why start?
What we believe, we look to validate. Then it gets Repeated, and Rationalized.
Smart investors and successful business people are more conscious of their weak patterns, and face them head on so that they can change them. They use the other 2 R’s, Recognize and Reorganize. Addressing the pattern that does not work for you allows you to release it and rearrange it into something that does work.
Set a goal – preferably a small, short-term one coupled with a long-term one. Perhaps saving $5 each day for the short-term, then creating a plan to ask for a raise in your fees or salary, backed by justification of your worth.
Then begin to listen to the repeating patterns that keep emerging, and rewrite them into the positive, productive message that aligns with your desired financial future.
Accept what you must, but challenge your assumptions.
Reference: The Secret Language of Money, by Dr. David Krueger